Sunday, May 31, 2009

something that makes the world a little brighter.....

**sigh** i dont think i've felt this happy since...... since, well, since i met cody.

Matt's amazing, he might be older than my, by alot, and he's not perfect, but who is? Hes funny, nice, sesative, strong, smart. and he makes me smile and laugh, and blush wayy more than i should.
He understands my weird opinions, he feels privledged to be with me, and i can't wait to see him whenever we're apart. I care more about my apprearence now, and i love how he thinks i look good in what ever i wear=] he trys so hard to please my parents and make they feel like he's not gonna kill me or somthing.

I feel wonderful about him, and just writing this has me smiling.


Nad this is all not a bad thing, yes, josh is upset, yes i still love and miss, and cry over cody, but its slowly getting better, and i'm feeling less like i'm obligated to hate him forever.

Matt knows about cody, kind of, he knows that i loved him and that he died, but he doesnt know about the other stuff. About what happened that night, about how josh saved me, he doesnt kniw..... yet, the convo is bound to come up... but its better left unspoken for now.

soon enough, it will have been 6 months since then...... but it doesnt seem like, it seems like only a few weeks, if not lell, but nows the time for healing, and growing, and thats what i'm doing =]





on to happier things.. kinda, a new FP story, not published yet, as of now, but its on its way** forewarnign** well, gonna go showermore and text him <3 post more later, maybe the first chapter...... idk





bye babes!

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